Thanksgiving–Are We There Yet?

By Francine Van, Guest Contributor

I feel I have aged ten years in one! I lost my life last year and don’t quite know how to retrieve it.

Hope emerges watching society norms fall back into place with thoughts the pandemic world is falling behind us. My risk assessments are changing navigating simple chores without the dread. But not without new anxieties that I developed over the year. Driving. Mild depression. Food insecurities. Toilet paper hoarding. The safety our lives offered now feel unsure. Will I have hydro or water tomorrow? What else can go wrong?  Should I go out? Mindless chatter in my head overwhelms me, yet I have nothing left to say.

The golden years have browned and burnt a bit. The golden age I had navigated into a contented life is gone. Volunteerism stopped. Job stopped. Nothing is left as I knew it. I redecorated my little apartment into a comfy nest and now is the time I need to lean into finding new ideas on the outside if I want to resecure a promising future. Surviving, not thriving is not an option. I need more. I cannot settle for less than finding the joy factor.

Seniorhood was lucky depending on your perspective too. I was allowed to stay home for the year watching the world go by. Aloneness was safety but loneliness was not, when unconnected to anyone. Heartful stories of gratefulness to have experienced such intimate rich times with family and heartless stories of being overworked and exposed in scary frenzied times are being told. I sit here and wonder what the actual reality is out there and know it is time to restart my life and live, now vaccinated.

I always believed the universe will present what you are looking for. And just as I asked for new opportunity, I received an answer by mail. A notice from the Attorney General peaked my curiosity, and reading it I found I had been selected for jury duty. (What is that old saying …be careful what you wish for! hahahhaha)

Are we there yet? Thanksgiving in Canada.