Special contribution by Francine Van
The details we were never told, and now I know why……….
Francine Van
— You never really retire, it is an illusion to get you to change jobs without pay for family…you become a babysitter, chauffeur, personal shopper, hairdresser, cleaning lady, etc. etc. …need I go on? Almost forgot ….. amidst all this I am trying to get my photography project off the ground!
— You cannot possibly take all the vitamins recommended for your age, (they will make you smell or give you gas). Just take the hormones to stay out of jail
— Budget on the anti-aging creams and makeup …when they say too good to be true, they mean it …except get the strong hold hairspray for that spot called the ‘Aruba’ on the top back of your head, it shows now …did you notice!
— When you find yourself repeating a lot, remember when you are not talking to your parents or grandchildren
— When your mom says her lunch was a chocolate bar, it’s ok …she made it to over fifty
— Don’t drink all eight glasses of water recommended or you won’t get any sleep
— Exercise your butt, it flattens …hmmmm!
— The coffee shops become the place of choice rather than the bars, too much wine and no one picks you up when you fall off the bar stool.
And lastly, although I could go on, cancel all those over fifty joke emails, magazine subscriptions, and any reminders that are self-defeating. Denial is a wonderful thing and soon like your parents, you will forget.
As Mark Twain so accurately put it: “Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand.” Shall look forward to your comments so that we can all remember laughing is great medicine to get us through life.
Francine, you left me howling! Thank you for presenting the “sunny” side of 50 with such humour and clarity.
Just goes to show how important a role attitude and mind-set really play in life and our ability to enjoy it – or not!
Indeed, a healthy dose of humour goes a long way. So does “not sweating the small stuff”.
You’ve presented some wonderful points for us ‘Golden Girls and Gents’ to bring along as we drift ever forward towards that deep dark night!
Thank you again for the morning laugh you provided!
By: Spunkymum on November 30, 2011
at 10:19 am
What a sense of humor you have!
I also have a ‘Aruba’ spot at the back of my head and don’t like it one bit. I also identify with the challenges you are dealing with at this time of life. You’re lucky you don’t seem to have health issues that plague us as we enter these supposedly glorious golden years.
By: Sarah on November 30, 2011
at 5:47 pm
Really enjoyed reading your amusing post and loved your Mark Twain quote on happiness. I am mother of 3 grown children who gave me lots of grey hair, also have some wonderful memories too and now one grandson I babysit quite often. I am retired but most days I am run off my feet. Must find more ‘me’ time. At times I used to think that this quote from Sophocles was applicable to my kids — here it is: “But whoever gives birth to useless children, what would you say of him except that he has bred sorrows for himself, and furnishes laughter for his enemies”.
HA HA HA!!!
By: gsandler on November 30, 2011
at 5:51 pm
In today’s world everywhere we turn we see advertisments to distract seniors from the inevitability of getting older. The T.V.the media,newspapers etc, tell us of the importance of face lifts that give seniors a plastic appearance. This is quite stinky to me. I think of Rembrandt ( 1606-69) who painted elerly people who had no evidence of hair dye, face lifts and no make up, and this says to me when I look at it that old is beautifull and wise. The only thing that happens is that our physical faculties have to slow down and I see everything else as beautiful. Rembrandt also painted dozens of self portraits where we can see the beauty of how he grew older.
By: Dolores Ianthe on December 21, 2011
at 6:01 pm