Special contribution by Francine Van
The details we were never told, and now I know why……….
— You never really retire, it is an illusion to get you to change jobs without pay for family…you become a babysitter, chauffeur, personal shopper, hairdresser, cleaning lady, etc. etc. …need I go on? Almost forgot ….. amidst all this I am trying to get my photography project off the ground!
— You cannot possibly take all the vitamins recommended for your age, (they will make you smell or give you gas). Just take the hormones to stay out of jail
— Budget on the anti-aging creams and makeup …when they say too good to be true, they mean it …except get the strong hold hairspray for that spot called the ‘Aruba’ on the top back of your head, it shows now …did you notice!
— When you find yourself repeating a lot, remember when you are not talking to your parents or grandchildren
— When your mom says her lunch was a chocolate bar, it’s ok …she made it to over fifty
— Don’t drink all eight glasses of water recommended or you won’t get any sleep
— Exercise your butt, it flattens …hmmmm!
— The coffee shops become the place of choice rather than the bars, too much wine and no one picks you up when you fall off the bar stool.
And lastly, although I could go on, cancel all those over fifty joke emails, magazine subscriptions, and any reminders that are self-defeating. Denial is a wonderful thing and soon like your parents, you will forget.
As Mark Twain so accurately put it: “Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand.” Shall look forward to your comments so that we can all remember laughing is great medicine to get us through life.

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